the first death

Yup. Today I experienced my first death. In the accident & emergency department.

Just moments ago he was complaining about the pain when inserting the branula for the IV line.

He was asking the doctors to call his wife, informing her that he's in the hospital.

We watched him, then as his vital signs became normal, we left the room.

After about one hour later, I came back to the room.

A doctor and a few nurses and medical assistants were performing the cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) on him. There were other medical students there as well.

The uncle's face was pale as sheet.

His arms not moving.

In a matter of seconds his pulse pressure dropped from 50 to 30.

The nurse shone the pen torch in to his eyes, there were no reaction.

The doctor then said "We wait for the flat line (referring to the ECG)"

At that point I thought, "What? Just wait? Shouldn't we do the CPR anyway??"

But in a few seconds, the flat line appeared. It doesn't seem to matter whether the last few seconds of his life was accompanied by the CPR.

The doctor called the time of death, wiped the sweat of his forehead, and proceeded to walk out of the room.

The rest of us stood there, dumb founded.

Just moments before, the uncle was complaining of pain, whining, sweating and all.

Now, in a matter of seconds, he is gone. FOREVER.

It just feels weird. Awkward. Empty. Feeling the lost of a life. Watching it happen in front of your very eyes.

The first death that I experienced.

Today.