Blahs

Ahh. Nothing like a refreshing hot shower. Yes, I'm still in college. And no, my house in college do not have a specially installed heater in the bathroom. I'm doing it all fashioned style, boil water, pour in pail, add cold water... tada! You get yourself a nice, warm water to bathe with, to clear up your mind, just a signal to your body that it's time to relax. Hehe.

Yup. I'm in my second week of opthalmology posting, and I'm still lazy. It's like taking alternate days to study. Like yesterday I read one whole chapter about glaucoma, so today I'm taking my day off. Tomorrow another chapter and then another day off. In the rate I'm going now, I would never finish reading the earlier subject of ENT to prepare for the exams in June. *sigh*

Well. The 4-1-1. I've decided to get myself the fundoscope, which comes in a set with the ENT tool as well, costing me RM690. So instead of getting myself a brand new slim Sony PSP, (which costs RM800 -- lowest price ever) I got myself a tool to study. *sigh* But I guess it will be worth it since I'll be able to have ample of practices to look into one's eye before the exam. *hopefully*

I really want to watch the latest movies in the cinema these days, such as "Rule #1" or "27 dresses", but currently, I just feel like sleeping all day. And during weekends, to be a couch potato in front of the television, watching E! Channel pointlessly the whole day, and be entertained. Why bother about the diseases of the eye when everyone's talking about who bared their undies to the press, about Britney Spears's court proceedings and so much more important news right?

I'm suddenly starting to wonder whether I really want this as my profession. To be a doctor? Well. Sometimes, you really want something. And coincidently your parents wants it for you too. But so much more. So you do it, partially for yourself, but mostly to please your parents. Something like that. Go figure.

But never the less, I'm already here, now, and there's no turning back. So I'll just have to face every coming day with a stronger mind, as everything is mind over matter. Is it? Heh.

I took a test that day, about what specialty I should take after graduating. Somehow, I got opthalmologist. Eye doctor? I mean, it's not that I don't like it, I'm enjoying the posting now, but I kind of thought I'd be more of the surgeon type or somewhat like that? We'll see how that goes.

Now I feel like lying on the bed, thinking about what I should do during the weekend, rather than prepare for Dr. Nazri's lecture tomorrow. By the way, I kinda like the way Dr. Nazri speaks to the patient. Very professional. And he listens to them attentively. Or pseudo-attentively. Who really knows right? :P

All these feelings right now tense me up. It's like being too relaxed makes me tensed.

Weird, huh? But that's seriously how I feel right now. Maybe I should do more multitasking, so I would be tense, and hence, relax. Huh. Now, go figure. :P